If you want to have a positive day, create it. 

When I go to bed at night, I spend some time reviewing my day. I calmly bring to my mind all the good things that I attracted into my life that day. After analyzing them, I am grateful for having lived them. The energy of gratitude attracts things of similar energy.

Once I finish with everything positive, I start to think about what I didn’t like or what didn’t make me happy. Here is where my analysis begins.

  • First of all, I recognize that everything came from me. Nothing and no one is to blame.
  • Then I stop with each experience and look within myself for my lesson.
  • For clarity, I turn to my Holy Spirit or Higher Self to help me see things clearly.
  • Some of the lessons may be patience, compassion, tolerance.
  • Once I am clear about the reason for that experience in my life, I let it go after expressing gratitude. I don’t keep it in my mind and then suffer again for not letting go.

The following morning, before I get up, I plan the day I want to have in my mind. Here I use all my imagination.

  • If I have specific things to do, I think about each one individually. I visualize myself doing it, and I bring to my heart the great joy that this activity will bring me.
  • I think of all the details and enjoy it on my mind. I don’t allow anything negative to enter my mind.
  • After I’ve done the same thing with everything I want to do that day, I get up and start my day.

I create the day I want. And if I don’t make it today, it will be tomorrow. You also have that power.

 

I should forgive whom? Are you crazy?

That’s what I thought when someone told me to forgive someone who had hurt me. If you believe someone has hurt you maliciously, it’s impossible to forgive.

This is where the concept of forgiveness from A Course in Miracles comes in. As I have mentioned in other blogs, the Course teaches that everything you see outside is a projection of a thought that you have inside.

I always remember what one of my teachers said: “There is nothing out there; you are always talking to yourself.” And you will say, what do you mean? I see people and situations outside of me and react to them.

That is the concept you have to let go of to learn to forgive. I have already mentioned in other blogs that everything is energy. Energy is electromagnetic and draws energy of a similar vibration to itself. Those thoughts that you have in the unconscious are energy. If you think you are not worth enough, you will attract people and circumstances into your life that reflect that thought.

When you project what you think and feel and throw it to another person, it is an excellent opportunity that life gives you to see what you have hidden inside. It is much easier to see the straw in someone else’s eye than your own.

If you manage to change the way you see things and get out of the victim role, you begin to see any situation or person outside of yourself as your teacher, teaching you your inner thoughts. In that case, you will realize that by forgiving the other, you are forgiving yourself.

Forgiveness, then, can be summarized in 3 steps:

  1. Recognize that the problem is not outside of you. With this step, you realize that you don’t have to wait for the other to change for you to be happy or at peace. The one who has to change in their thoughts is you.
  2. Then comes the most challenging part, which is dealing with the feeling of guilt that comes from thinking that we have voluntarily separated from God. That guilt comes from the fear we feel when we think about the punishment that God will give us if he finds us. That is why we hide in the ego. But God is Love, and he only wants Love for us. That’s where the Holy Spirit comes in, that part of our mind that knows that separation never existed, except in our wrong mind.

In this second step, you say to the Holy Spirit in you, I no longer want to feel guilty.

  1. Here you surrender your feelings of fear and guilt to the Holy Spirit and say, help me to see things differently, and I assure you that It will.

Forgiveness is looking past an attack and seeing it as a request for help. There can’t be any exceptions. Neither the other person is guilty, nor are you. That is the vision of Christ.

The above is a process. It’s not pressing a button, and that’s it. The important thing is that you make it part of yourself so that you don’t miss opportunities for healing and forgiveness.

Are you tired of suffering?

A Course in Miracles gives us a way to leave behind our dramas, which arise from being immersed in the ego’s thought system. I explained this system in a previous blog.

The way the Course gives us to stop suffering is the thought system of the Holy Spirit. I have already mentioned on many previous occasions that for the Course, there are only two emotions: love and fear and that when we are in fear, which is reflected in guilt, we are in the ego. On the contrary, when we are in love, we are with the Holy Spirit.

I will explain this with examples.

Imagine you’ve been trying to lose weight and haven’t lost a pound. You are walking down the street, and you meet a friend who tells you how fat you are. You can react in two ways, both of which arise from the ego’s thought system, or guilt which is one of the expressions of fear:

  • You get upset and tell her how ugly her clothes fit her. You answer like this because in your mind, you think you are fat. When you project it outside, and someone reflects it to you by telling you, you blame them for how you feel, and you attack back. This behavior is going to keep you in the ego feeling bad. Or,
  • You start to cry, feeling like a victim, and tell her she hurt you, that she is very cruel. Here you make her feel guilty, which is nothing more than a projection of the guilt you have inside for being cruel at another time. This behavior also keeps you in the ego feeling bad.

 

The Course says that there is another way to react, which is with the Holy Spirit. There are only two emotions, either you are in love or the ego. One excludes the other. You cannot be in both at the same time.

No one full of love attacks another person, for all they can see and feel is love. The Course teaches that a person is either giving love or asking for love. If you see someone acting from the ego and you immediately think that that person is not happy and that is the way he has to ask for love, you will feel compassion instead of anger. If you feel compassion, you will treat them with love. I always tell my granddaughter that the more unbearable or cruel a person is, the more they are suffering inside.

This way of looking at things is the thought system of the Holy Spirit.

Now I’m going to change the above scene:

  • You are walking, and when they call you fat, you immediately think, that person must feel terrible, and that is why they are unloving. Let me give them love.
  • You immediately ask the Holy Spirit what you must do to give them love. And when you feel the answer, that’s what you are going to do.
  • You will feel very happy and the other person too because they receive the love they need and don’t even know they needed.

That moment, where you manage to change the way you see things from ego to love, is the holy instant of the Course and results in forgiveness.

Although the process seems simple, it takes a long time to complete. We have so much guilt in the unconscious that to remove it all at the moment would be terrifying. That is why life presents us with many opportunities to do it little by little. So have a lot of patience and give love whenever the opportunity presents itself. You will be a lot happier.

A Course in Miracles and the Holy Relationship

In the previous blog, I explained what a special relationship is. A special relationship becomes a holy relationship in what the Course calls the holy instant.

As Kenneth Wapnick explains in his Glossary-Index to A Course in Miracles, the holy instant is the interval of time in which we choose forgiveness instead of guilt..; it is an expression of our little willingness to live in the present…

As I mentioned in the blog of the special relationship, in this type of relationship, which is what we are used to living, as long as the other acts as we expect, we are happy. When it changes, we are unhappy and begin to blame them for our unhappiness.

When you learn to see things differently and understand the difference between being in the ego or the Holy Spirit, fear or love, you begin to see the relationship with other eyes and another purpose.

My thermometer to know whether or not I am in the ego is my inner peace. I learned to be very attentive to my feelings. As soon as I realize that I am not at peace, I stop. I admit that some thought of mine is taking peace away from me (I do not blame anyone). The next step I take is to hand over everything to the Holy Spirit, which is that part of me that knows it is connected to God.

When you are in a relationship, and you already know that in essence, we are all One, the other person is in your life to help you heal and raise your consciousness. Any situation that takes away your peace shows you the unconscious areas you have to heal.  In other words, each one is the mirror of the other’s unconscious.

In the holy relationship, you stop seeing the other person as someone who should fill your voids and insecurities. Both begin to see themselves as allies in their mutual paths of awakening.

Although situations will arise where one will draw out the other’s anger and unconscious fears, both recognize that this is the primary purpose of being together. They breathe deeply to return to peace, they hand it over to the Holy Spirit to help them see the situation from love and not from fear, and without a doubt, it will. Once forgiveness is given, which is ultimately to ourselves, since everything arises from our thoughts seen outside, they live another holy instant.

The holy relationship is the most glorious way to live.

You are depriving me…

It is interesting to live with other people. If we are alert, we learn many things about ourselves. As I have mentioned in other blogs, we are always a mirror of each other.

When I was a child, my father would lie down reading, and any noise bothered him. Like children, my siblings and I played and made noises with our laughter and screams. My mother would come running and tell us to be quiet because we were bothering my father. After hearing that statement so many times, you can imagine that one of the thoughts that stayed in my mind is that I bother people.

In our walk through life, once we understand that what we see outside of us is, actually, a projection of our thoughts unto another person, the interactions become very interesting. We stop blaming others and start looking for the thought we are projecting. It’s like a detective game.

With that in mind, I’ll tell you about my latest experience. Carla, my daughter-in-law, works from home. She spends all day in the office. On many occasions, I have offered to help her with something. For example, putting her clothes in the washing machine or washing her dishes. She always answered me, no, thanks. I can do it later.

After listening to that for a long time, I decided to talk to her, and the conversation was most interesting. I said, Carla, why is it that that you never allow me to help you? Don’t you like other people touching your things? No, she answers me. It is that I think that I bother people, she answered me.

Here it is, I said to myself. My thought that I bother people, which I believed I had already healed, is reflected here. That showed me that there are still some lingering thoughts still rooted within me that I need to heal. If we can see our exchanges in this way, we see where we are in our process of fully awakening in consciousness.

But it did not stop there. After thinking for a few minutes about what Carla told me, I asked her if she did not feel happy when she helped someone, and she said that she did. Then I told her, well, you are depriving me of feeling happy when I do something for you.

To help each other in raising our consciousness, we agreed that if I offered to help her with something and she refused, I would tell her as a reminder: “You are depriving me.”

I invite you to see the exchanges in life in this way. It is much more exciting and less painful.

Trust the Universe

It is interesting to see how life brings us what we need at the precise moment. After living in Florida for 14 years, alone and happy since I adjusted to the fact that my husband had passed away, my youngest son, Pedro, and his wife, Carla, suggested that I sell my house, they would sell their apartment. Then, we would buy something appropriate so that they, my granddaughter, and I could live together. At first, I was shocked. How was I going to lose what I identified as my independence? One day I thought I would and another I changed my mind and would decide to stay in my house.

Pedro and Carla lived in Florida five minutes from my house when this happened, and the oldest, Juan C., had lived in Southern California for about 20 years. Without me having decided yet, Pedro got a job in Southern California, and they were all moving there.

I immediately decided to go with them, but I set some conditions of how the house needed a specific distribution to feel that I had my area separate from theirs.

For several months we were looking for a house to rent and there were always about ten people before us. Since Pedro had to be at his work, we decided to set off with the moving truck and our cars on the 5-day adventure driving across the United States.

We decided that when we got to California, we would stay in an Airbnb until we got a house, and at that point, it would be the first house we found. We just wanted a roof and rooms to sleep in.

A week before we started our adventure, a real estate broker called us about a house we had applied for, but someone had already rented. She told us that the contract with the previous person had fallen through and that the house was ours if we wanted it.

We immediately said yes without seeing it. When we arrived and saw the house, the house was exactly what we needed and that Carla and I had been visualizing. The first thing I thought when I saw it was, “why do you doubt if you know that the things you need are always given to you at the perfect time”?

Now we are together, but each has its space. My son’s family is on the second floor with three bedrooms and a loft, and I with my “suite” on the first.

If we could trust 100% in something superior to ourselves, let’s call it God, Supreme Intelligence, whatever, constantly giving us what we need, we would have a lot less stress in our lives. As our thoughts are our molds, in this case, it was the distribution of the house that Carla and I wanted, it is essential to be aware of what message we are sending to the Universe. The Universe always says yes. It does not analyze to see if it suits us or not. That is up to us.

Health before anything

The secret to a healthy body is a healthy mind, free from vibrations of fear, stress, repressed and unconscious negative thoughts, negative emotions, such as anger, resentment, judgments, etc. 

To free yourself from all that and have good health, you must raise your vibrational level. You achieve this by getting in touch with the most subtle energy that exists, the energy of love. This energy begins cleaning these blocked negative energies, which, if not transmuted, manifest in the physical body in the form of diseases.

Behind every illness, there is a thought and a repressed emotion. The thought is mostly unconscious and the emotion sometimes terrifies us. But if you only deal with the physical manifestation and not its cause, then it will manifest again in the future. That is why it is so essential to get in touch with those thoughts and emotions.

Different types of emotions have different vibrational levels. As I have explained in previous blogs, you attract into your life by the law of attraction, what you are, how you vibrate. If you have negative energies suppressed, you will attract diseases of similar energy. What you have to do is raise your vibration.

Therefore, instead of hating or resenting the condition, send it love. Start by accepting it and learning the lesson you have from it. Once you achieve this, by changing the energy, the condition changes.

If you are not healthy, it is because, at some level, you derive a benefit from it. If you want to have good health, you must do a profound analysis of the benefit you derive. This analysis can be:

• If you learned from a young age to receive love and attention when you were sick;

• If it is the way you allow yourself to rest if you lead an overly hectic life;

• If it is a way to control others.

• Anyway, there can be thousands of reasons why you want to be unconsciously ill.

If you want to be healthy, find the benefit to understand that illness is not necessary. That there are other healthy ways to achieve the same thing.

Joan Borysenko, Ph.D., in her book Minding the Body, Mending the Mind, recommends several ideas necessary to achieve prosperity in health:

1. You cannot control the external circumstances of your life, but you can control your reactions to them.

2. Optimal health is the product of both physical and mental factors. Therefore, exercise your body, eat mindfully, and meditate daily.

3. Think of yourself as healthy.

4. Things change. Change is the only constant in life.

5. Your beliefs are incredibly powerful.

6. The only way to escape stress, fear, and doubt is to confront them directly and see them for what they are.

7. Emotions fall into two broad categories, fear, and love.

8. Do you prefer to be right, or do you prefer to experience peace?

9. Accept yourself as you are.

10. Practice forgiveness.

11. Be open to the teachings of life.

12. Be patient.

Do you know how to give and receive?

I recently mentioned in another blog that giving and receiving are the same. Since a relationship is a perfect laboratory for healing, I will examine one way this principle manifests itself.

At all times, you are giving and receiving, even if you don’t realize it. Everything is energy, and you are in a constant exchange of energy with other people.

You are constantly giving and receiving through thought. Creating awareness of these is your responsibility. In this way, you will only be giving positive and uplifting thoughts.

It is essential to establish a balance between giving and receiving in a relationship, be it a couple, friendship, family, etc. To establish this balance, it is fundamental to feel that you are worthy of receiving.

As long as you are open to receive and willing to give, there will be a balance in this energetic exchange. It is when you close yourself to receiving or are unable to give that you create an imbalance.

This imbalance often causes resentment in those who give all the time without feeling they are receiving or those who receive without feeling they are giving.

In the special relationships that A Course in Miracles mentions, where we unconsciously seek a relationship to fill some void, the saying that opposites attract has its truth. Often, one who doesn’t know how to give will attract someone who needs to learn to receive and vice versa.

I have previously said that what we see outside is a mirror of what we have inside. I recommend that you stop the blaming game and start looking inside. If the other person complains you don’t give them what they need or don’t know how to receive, stop and listen. Look for your thoughts that are not allowing you to give or to receive. If you want to raise your consciousness, see the other person as your teacher and be grateful that they are there to teach you what you need to learn.

As giving and receiving is the same, start giving what you want to receive, and you will see how everything changes. As energy returns multiplied to the place of origin, you will not only notice the happiness of giving, but to the extent that you give, you will receive.

You receive love by giving it. But remember that true giving is unconditional and expects nothing in return.

Are you brave or fearful?

Changing your mistaken thoughts to thoughts of love is for brave people. Once you decide to do it, the only way that you can transform them is when they come out of your unconscious so that you can look at them and accept that they are your thoughts.

This decision sometimes brings a lot of emotional pain. When you decide that you want to look at them head-on and heal whatever they mean to you, your Holy Spirit or Higher Self will attract circumstances into your life that force you to look at them and change them. Therefore, if you have decided to grow in awareness, the road can be full of ups and downs when life brings you opportunities to grow. Don’t be scared. They are just thoughts and emotions with which you have been carrying from a very young age.

These are the steps that I use when I am experiencing a time of great pain or turmoil:

1. First of all, I accept responsibility. I don’t blame whatever is outside of me but rather acknowledge that some thought of mine drew it to me so that I can heal it. Sometimes I know what thought is, sometimes I don’t. But I know that it is always my thought and not what someone said or did outside of me. This step takes me out of the victim role where I think someone did something to me.

2. I turn to the Holy Spirit (HS) in me. I speak to that part of me as if it were a friend. I say something like this: HS, I am feeling very lonely. (Here, I recognize how I feel). I know that comes from my thought that I don’t belong, but I don’t know how to change it. (Here, I assume responsibility). I hand over my thought to you so that you can help me see it differently, and I can forgive myself for having thought like that. (I deliver it to a higher level)

I don’t know if it was Einstein, but some wise man said that we can’t solve a problem on the same level it was created. You have to go to a higher level.

These simple steps, if you do them every time you are not at peace, which is your true essence, can help you in several ways:

1. You immediately step out of the victim role. When you project your thoughts outside and blame someone because they “did” something to you, you get tangled up in the world of the ego, that is, in your thoughts that tell you that you are separated from God and everything else. This idea causes a lot of fear and any of its ramifications like guilt, anger, etc. In order not to feel them, you project them to the one who is outside of you.

2. You take back your power. When you are a victim, you have to wait for the other person or situation to change to be happy. By regaining your power, you can be happy just by changing your perception to one of love. It is being able to see beyond appearances to the perfect being in front of you, who, with his behavior, is telling you that he is unhappy and needs love. When you manage to do this every time something takes away your peace, little by little, it becomes natural and effortless.

It depends on you. In every moment, you can choose peace. And if you fail, choose again.

Principle 9: “We are students and teachers to each other.”

There is an interconnection between everything in the Universe. At that level, everything is one unit. There is no separation. What a person does has repercussions throughout the Universe. The Universal Laws govern this dimension.

Sometimes there are situations in your life, just like you were thinking about a friend and the phone rings and it’s her, and you say, what a coincidence. The psychologist Carl Jung called this synchronicity when events occur where something beyond the causal relationship is involved.

There are neither coincidences nor synchronicities. In reality, teachers and students come together when both are ready to begin healing. What you see outside is a projection of your thoughts. You are always looking at yourself in a mirror. All the people and situations that you have in your life are there because you have something to learn from them. Here the law of magnetism and the law of attraction is at stake. I have talked about them on other blogs.

As you understand the mirror theory and use it for your growth, you take advantage of these “teachers” to see which are your thoughts are projected outside. If you take responsibility for your projected thoughts, your relationships will become more and more harmonious.

That teacher helps you see things that you have within you that you have forgotten or that are so deep in the unconscious that you have not identified them. The best teachers are your family relationships because it is with whom you spend the most time. They can be adults or children. Age doesn’t matter. It’s your reaction to them.

But they don’t have to be people. They can be objects, animals, governments, entities, etc. So if you react to anything in any way other than love, you have to look inward and see what about you they are reflecting.

The same is true in reverse. For that teacher of yours, you are his teacher. There is a saying in Puerto Rico that says, “hunger and the desire to eat come together.”

When you manage to integrate this principle into your life, all your relationships will change. You come out of your role as a victim when you stop thinking that someone did something to you, and you become the primary role of your healing. Then, you recognize that you are only love, and you begin to extend it to all the people you meet. What a wonderful way to live!